Chapter 16

EPOV

She scared the ever living shit out of me, it was as simple as that.

When she had that panic attack in the car, I had felt beyond lost.

Mainly because it had come out of nowhere and there was very little I could do.

One minute she was sitting on my lap, a little quite, but seemingly fine, and then the next minute she was shaking and gasping for breath. And I honestly had no clue what had set her off, which didn’t sit well with me.  I needed to be able to read her, to know what to expect from her, if this had any chance of working.

Alice was amazing, of course, as she tried to get Bella to calm down and breathe properly. It took a few minutes, but she managed it and Bella calmed back down.

I pulled her back to my chest, wrapping my arms around her body and whispered encouraging words to her, like how good she had done and how beautiful she was.

I knew I was rambling, but she really had scared me, and more than that, I was scared about what had set it off.

By the time we got back to the house, Bella was asleep in my arms and I took her up to what I hoped would be her new room for the next few days.

Mom had made sure that it was tastefully decorated in light blues, whites and some gold dotted about. With the furniture, it looked almost classical in design.  It seemed to be quite calming, which I was pretty sure that Bella would like, from what I had gathered about her so far.

I laid her carefully down on the bed and noticed straight away that being in jeans was going to be a nightmare for her.

I didn’t know whether or not to call for Alice to get her undressed, but knowing my mother, she would be in deep talks with the girls about their day, so I took it upon myself to get Bella undressed myself.

It wasn’t like I hadn’t seen her out of her clothes yet.

It didn’t take long and soon she was just in her underwear and under the covers.

I stood by the side of the bed for a few moments, taking in her sleeping form. She really did look so angelic with her hair fanned out across the pillow and over her bare shoulder.

Once I’d had my fill of looking at her, I found myself lying by her side on the bed and I started stroking her hair as she slept lightly. I was truly entranced by her natural beauty.

I knew I shouldn’t have been lying next to her, but I wanted to be there for her when she woke up.

I vowed there and then to tell her what the job was immediately and that I would give her the option of backing out.

I couldn’t think of her staying here for any other reason apart from her wanting to stay here.

If she didn’t want to, I would let her go.

Even after just a few short hours of being in her company, despite knowing about her for a while, I knew it would hurt to see her walk out of this house and away from me.

But if she couldn’t be happy here, I couldn’t in good conscience, keep her here.

When I read over dad’s plans, it was for the business. Everything up to this point had been to benefit the company, to get our name back up the list and to bring in the money, but now it was different.

I realized as she slept, that our feelings were more invested into this than what I first realized and I didn’t want to hurt her.

If I had to, I would let her go and find another girl to work with, even if it killed me.

It would hurt, more than I cared to think about, but I wouldn’t drag Bella into this lifestyle if she had any reservations.

“You look troubled,” her sleepy voice shook me from my thoughts.

I smiled sheepishly at her as she rolled onto her side to face me.

She had a few lines on her face where the pillow had been and she looked adorable in her ‘just woke up’ state, but to me, she was more beautiful than ever.

“What’s troubling you, Edward?” she asked but I shook my head.

I couldn’t believe it, here she was, worried about me after she was the one who had a panic attack in the car.

Selfless, purely selfless.

“I’m more worried about you. What happened in the car?” I asked as I sat up slightly and pulled her to my side.

“Why am I in just my underwear, did you get me undressed?” she blushed as she settled against my chest.

I noticed straight away that the blush she had wasn’t confined to just her face and I prayed that I wouldn’t get a hard on knowing that it crept right down her neck and chest.

“I did, and I was a complete gentleman about it, and anyway, I’ve seen you wearing less,” I chuckled as she slapped my chest playfully.

I liked this side of her.

“Come on, what happened?” I urged her to answer.

If I could avoid it happening again, I would need to know what triggered it in the first place.

She sucked in a jagged breath, tucking her lip between her teeth as she looked up at me bashfully from under her lashes. “Why are we here, Edward? Is it a real job, with health benefits and stuff, or is it a more... sinister arrangement?” Her voice was soft, but I could hear the fear in it.

This was it, the moment I had been dreading. But... I had promised her, and myself, that I would tell her as soon as I could and I didn’t want to keep anything from her.

I would just have to bite the bullet and go for it, no matter how much it hurt, or what I could end up losing.

“I’ll tell you the truth, Bella, but I want you to listen to everything I have to say before you go and make any judgments or decisions, can you promise me that?” I asked softly as I ran my fingers up and down her back. She didn’t answer me, but I felt her nod her head.

“My father owns and runs a business, the same business his father ran before him and his father before that. Back in the Victorian times, it was done through photographs and sketches, but now it’s all on film or online. In one word, Bella, its pornography,” I stopped there as I felt Bella’s body freeze and then she tried to move away.

I held her tight.

“Please, just give me a moment to explain,” I pleaded and I breathed out a sigh as she rested her body back against mine, even though it was tense.

“Things are changing in the industry, and DVD’s are becoming less popular as things are more internet based. My father came up with a plan, something that’s never been thought of in the industry so far and that’s why we advertised.”

“He wants us to become porn stars?” she gasped lightly as she pulled away from me harshly and looked at me and I saw the one thing I didn’t want to see.

Fear.

I sighed deeply as I pulled her close to me again. It made it easier if I didn’t see her face. I didn’t want to see the fear in her eyes. It crippled me.

“In a way, yes. He wants to have a reality show based on porn stars, but with twists. The concept is based off of reality TV shows, things like Big Brother and such, but as I said, with twists. He wants the guys to be the porn stars and for the girls not to be. He wants them as natural as possible and in no way previously connected to the business. There will be cameras everywhere and the ‘actors’ will be filmed 24-7, with a few exceptions. Everything we do, after we settle in, will be based on what the viewers want. We will have a few weeks to get used to our surroundings, and each other, of course,” I finished talking, but continued to keep her face hidden from me.

I didn’t want to see the look of rejection in her eyes.

“And where do you and I fit in with this?” she asked slowly and carefully.

I rested my head back and covered my face with my arm.

“There will be three couples, Bella. You and I, Alice and Jasper, and then Rose and Emmett,” I replied in a whisper as I felt her body flinch.

“You don’t have to do this, Bella, you really don’t. You can go home, get on with your life, you haven’t signed anything, you’re under no obligation,” I finally said after what felt like hours of silence.

“You’re wrong on that point, Edward. I don’t have a home or a family to go back to. Alice and I planned to get out of that town regardless of whether we got the jobs or not, but in the grand scheme of things, out plan B wasn’t that great. After just one day, even being with people who knew this city, I know that there is no way of Alice and I making it on our own out there. So no, Edward, I can’t and won’t go back home,” she said sadly and my head whipped up on its own accord to look at her.

After a bit of encouragement, she explained about her mother and Alice’s father, about how they had left things and how they planned to never go back.

I was angry. No, I was beyond that.

She was eighteen for fucks sake and so miserable. She had nothing to look forward to.

Hell, she hadn’t even had the chance to go to college.

Those thoughts spurred me on.

“Bella, I’m not saying this to twist your arm, but please listen. If you stay here, I can guarantee that we can help you further your education, you will be well looked after, you will want for nothing. We can start off really slow, just like a normal relationship, we can date and stuff. I don’t want you to feel trapped here, I really don’t. Look, give it some time, talk to the others and hell, if you’re not up for it, I’ll still help you out through school.” I said as I refused to blink.

Now I needed the eye contact with her.

I needed her to know that I was deadly serious.